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Monday, August 8, 2011

whom then shall i fear?

it's been a while friends.
the 30x30 was a bit unsuccessful, due to lack of internet/tripod/motivation.
that's ok though! i still want to post outfits, just on my that's good.

also, there have been some changes taking place in my life lately.
this past week was one big ball of stress. mostly over exaggerated, but still...
i put my notice in for all 3 jobs, because i finally made the decision to move to Grand Rapids!
it has been a long year of turmoil and i keep being led back to this move. so finally i took it!
and to be honest, i'm not that excited about it yet.
a new place, being really close to my best friend all year long! living with an amazing friend.
starting fresh and really learning about myself in a new location. these things i am glad for.
but i think the week of frustration and quitting has clouded my chance to be thankful.

in these past 23 years of life, i have begun to listen to myself and know myself.
i have realized how vitally important that is. and exactly how much i didn't know!
i have become more in tune with the desires of my heart and the call of my spirit.
after going off on my own for a summer in college, i have always known that going is the surest and straightest way to cause me to pause and reconsider my God and where my heart is.
and so i am sure that this change will be another chance for me to pause...
listening only to God as i enter a world of unknown. not being clouded by comfort.

that is what i keep telling myself.
i am not doing the wrong thing by any means. and so if i feel this unsure, this uncomfortable.
then i must be doing something right. because we are not called to a life of comfort. is there even such a thing? we are called to move boldly, always pushing a bit further than we believe we are capable of, because it is in that free fall that we allow ourselves to be caught by the Lord.

praise God for opportunities of change. and for his belief in our imperfect hearts!

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