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Thursday, September 20, 2012

bleeding out.

the Lord has stretched me in many ways this year.
the best thing is the way i see him answering my longtime prayer of having real relationships with my family members. never before i have seen so clearly the ways he has blessed me with them. they are good, they are constant. they are not perfect. but they are mine!

my awesome little brother took me to see Imagine Dragons and AWOLnation :) he is the greatest. i am thankful we have become friends. family is pretty awesome.

between sets. such a great, small venue. where you can see the band and feel the pounding drums. the best. 

the theme of this week has been anger. unfortunately.
i don't feel like i am back-stepping, but i feel like i am working hard to process. and in the midst of processing comes anger at reliving the things you go through. my roommate and i had a great conversation about it (she is a therapist, so that's cool) - she taught me that anger is always a secondary emotion (who knew!) and that i need to process the root of my anger. welp. that's where i've been at this week. it is glorious to see God a midst it all. i praise him for his encouragement.
but it is hard.
lets be honest.

i believe in a God who feels righteous anger.
i believe in a God who is steadfast.
i believe in a God who is just and powerful.
all-knowing and redemptive.

he is greater than my anger, he is bigger than my pain.
i am resting in the promise that it will all be ok, but i am wrestling through how to react. where is the balance of submission and assertiveness?

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